[Parody Warning Here]
Smart Luggage Causes Bomb Scare
29 Jun 2018 08:14:03
Earlier this month several big brands of smart luggage announced they were folding up as major US airline banned their lithium-ion battery. One company that manage to avoid the ban has now found themselves in another spot of bother, after the smart case wandered away.

UberCase, the smart suitcase that follows its owner around avoided the ban on by powering itself off a hydrogen fuel cell, currently allowed on all major airlines. However one UberCase became unattached from its owner as he passed through a crowd of people, not knowing who to follow it defaulted to it’s backup protocol.

It phoned home, when it couldn’t find a pay phone it decided to find a policeman and explain the situation. At 9:15am the case spotted what it believed was a police officer but was in fact an airline pilot. Following the pilot it was able to make its way past several layers of airport security, the airline pilot unaware that the luggage was following him, but with other airport staff assuming it was his. At 9:45am the luggage attempted to board the plane with the pilot believing it was being taken to its owner. At this point the pilot realised the case was following him and locked it outside the aircraft. He immediately phoned security.

Not knowing what to do, after being shunned by what it thought was a police officer the bag decided to try and find a more friendly agent or that police officers manager. Several second later it found several armed guards that seemed very interested in it, but not very interested in getting close. The Luggage lunged forwarded towards them with the officers retreating away as fast as possible. The police believing the luggage to be a bomb did not want to fire upon it, worried they may set off the device. After 45 minutes of retreating by the agents and 45 minutes of advancing by the luggage, it is our understand that the luggage was thoroughly confused at this point, the agents were able to trap the device in a lounge used by staff. 10 minutes later police conducted a controlled explosion.

UberCase are now having to explain the actions of the luggage, with reports that the airport will place a blanket ban on smart luggage going forward.

A memorial for Luggies the Luggage is to be held on Friday.